"The Wink"

I was headed to the ROM last week to help out with the Google session at Toronto’s AdWeek. As I walked out of the subway, a middle aged looking man, who’d been looking at me for a while, winked at me as we crossed paths. WINKING… am I the only one who thinks winking is just incredibly awkward and in no way sexy? I have yet to see one person wink in a way that melted my heart.

I remember when I was younger I wanted to learn to wink well… it was kind of like learning to make the fart sounds with your armpit. It had a cool-factor back then. But I never felt like it came naturally to me. I looked like I was in the beginning stages of an eye infection. Maybe that’s why I'm so repulsed by “the Wink” to this day. I can’t do it. How do others muster the courage to look so ridiculous to a complete stranger?

Maybe he was conducting a social experiment? But really, what was he expecting me to do? Approach him with my phone number because his wink was oh so mesmerizing?

I say we abolish the wink altogether… or have everyone who insists on using it to facilitate introductions (or even to imply a coy joke to a friend) “winking classes” so that it doesn’t look like an awkward twitch.

That is all.